Has anyone else been a victim of “Church Hurt”?

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SunshineGirl

SunshineGirl

Active member
#41
Jan 6, 2024
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England
#41
mailmandan said:
My wife and I experienced church hurt at the very first church we joined after becoming Christians. At first, the church we were attending seemed great and they boldly preached the gospel, but they were caught up in certain legalistic issues over how to dress at church. Women were encouraged to wear long dresses down to their ankles and men were encouraged to wear suits. It wasn't an absolute must, but you were looked down on if you did not.

The women who attended that church reminded me of the Stepford wives. There were other things as well that I witnessed going on in that church which resulted from legalistic tendencies and favoritism that led me to turn to my wife during a church service one day and I said, "saved or not saved, people are still people!" I expected much more unity there than I was seeing. We left that church after about a year. Probably should have left sooner.
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You remind me of myself. When I first started to attend church the people were so welcoming and kind but it didn't take long for some of them to show their self-righteous and judgemental sides.
One was the Church Warden. I kept going to the Lord about this and one day he showed me something about the Church Warden and how just like me she was so broken and her nasty side was a cover up.
There is always more to people than we first think.
I love the lyrics to one of Dolly Parton's songs "don't judge me by the cover, because I'm a real good book" 🥰
 
K

Karlon

Well-known member
#42
Mar 8, 2023
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#42
GospelScribe said:
Has anyone else been a victim of “Church Hurt!” Is “Church Hurt” biblical?
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yes, me. the church i attended & worked for, held a meeting on a few subjects to save money. while i usually attended the meetings, this one i did not attend. they decided to put out to contract, the snowplowing without telling me. & even later, did not speak of it. if they approached me about it, i would have said, "alright, i'll tithe the snowplowing to the church"! when i 1st heard of the incident, i abruptly left the church & never went back. they went ahead & contracted someone to plow the next year for $500 & there was very little snow! so you see, i could have been still going to church there which would have been 31 years now & 31 years of snow could have been plowed for nothing!!!!!!!!
 
Cold

Cold

Active member
#43
Apr 18, 2024
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#43
I can only recall one instance of "church hurt" but it was quite mild. I think I was roughly 18-19 years at the time and was kind of looking forward to trying out church again after a few years and hoping to figure out how to get closer to God. Back then I wore all black, combat boots, had long shoulder blade length hair. Turns out the church my dad attended wasn't a fan of that so I got some interesting glares of disdain lol. Safe to say I decided church wasn't worth a second try for a long time. Who knew not liking bright colors could be seen as a bad thing?
 
M

MrScottxX

New member
#44
May 5, 2024
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USA
#44
GospelScribe said:
Has anyone else been a victim of “Church Hurt!” Is “Church Hurt” biblical?
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We have to remember that when a person or two at church hurts us, try being the example, try showing love and mercy and maybe even try patching things up, if that doesn't work, we should try and reach out to those in leadership position to see what can be done to get the situation resolved. The problem with many of today's churches is the lack of accountability. Another important thing to remember is that we should never take it out on God or our Savior because of how people might act or treat us. It's never God's fault but rather the fault of the person. If your issue are with the church leaders themselves and can not get anything resolved, consider changing churches. of course all important decisions should be back with prayerful consideration. :coffee:
 
Nehemiah6

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
#45
Jul 18, 2017
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#45
Tall_Timbers said:
Ack! I guess I'm alone in not knowing what was meant by "church hurt".
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Not really. It could mean anything, including being hurt by a gunman who walks in and starts shooting. But "victimized" could be a good term, except that everyone wants to be a victim. As to being "hurt" that is entirely up to you. One does not need to be hurt because people treat you unfairly and badly. If we expect this as par for the course in life and in churches, we simply move on. How we respond to something is up to us.
 
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